Dear Steve Jobs, I've been a fan of yours for as long as I've known you've existed, and although I'm fully aware that you're dead, I'd still like to thank you. Thank you for being a leader in the world of creating sleek modernity. When people think "modern," they think of the neutral silvers and blacks that make up your devices, and slim, crisp lines. Windows 10 tried hard, but they didn't make it. To borrow a word from my father, Apple devices are simply always going to be "sexy"-er. I've been told that your imagined Apple was of bright colors and weird shapes. Thank you for giving that up. Most sincerely, Audrey xoxo
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Dear Stargirl,
I really really really wish you were real. I'd drive out to Phoenixville and hug you tight and become buds with Cinnamon and ride bikes with you, and we could get strawberry-banana smoothies at the mall and cry over boys. I'd listen to every story, every whisper, every feeling you'd dare tell me, and I bet you'd do the same for me. You could teach me how to erase myself, and I bet I'd finally be able to do it. You could help me give long, rambling speeches about marvelous things. You could show me the library, and Enchanted Hill, and Margie's, and introduce me to Dootsie, and Perry, and Alvina, and Betty Lou. We could dance in the rain and go clockless and write poetry and breathe in the Real Air, and I would be so happy. We could boost each other's self esteems by you realizing how much you've inspired me, and me finally having the kind of person to talk to that I've yearned for since I was eight. Stargirl, I wish you were real. You could be my greatest friend. It's such a shame that fiction is immalleable. Love, Audrey xoxo Dear Lady-Who-Almost-Hit-Me-With-Her-Car,
Watch for flipping pedestrians next time. You wouldn't have actually hurt me, because you weren't going that fast, but don't flipping pull out into a flipping crosswalk on a flipping red light when there are flipping runners running right flipping in front of you what the flipping flip. I wish I actually knew who you were, so you could receive the punishment you actually flipping deserve. You better have this on your conscience for the rest of your life, because you almost hit over half of the Shippensburg Area Senior High School Cross Country Team. That ought to be a federal crime. Not love, Audrey xoxo (not) Dear My Second Favorite Seventeen-Year-Old,
NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE VALUE OF FRIENDS. Mary Iris Malone taught me that. She taught me a lot of other things too, but that's what I most needed to tell you. Because that's what we both really need to hear: past, present, and future. Love, Audrey xoxo Dear Me,
You need to stay more on top of things. Love, Audrey xoxo |
I'm Audrey, a college student and existential rambler.
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